Doing what's right for our clients

I will write a more detailed post about my traveling tales later, but there's something that's been on my mind for some time now. It's on the topic of clients and fulfilling your pervy desires no matter what the cost. There have been a number of things I've been approached with lately that I don't think are sane. One person in particular wants to session despite the inherent health risks.

My reasons for posting this are two fold. First, I want to bring attention to various situations and the risk-especially when not playing with an ethical and health aware Dom. Second, I want to discuss the ethics of receiving and requiring a deposit.

So, I've been asked to shove many unsanitary things up men's asses, do various types of play that would cause permanent harm to genitalia, and many other things. I have to ask myself, "do they know the risks? Is it my responsibility to point out what could go wrong?" Most of the time I would say, "yes"! I have pointed out the risks of permanent harm, but have been met with, "well so and so will do it in the suburbs..." Despite being met with opposition, I still feel it's necessary to point out risky behavior. I want people to live and play another day!

What I want to bring attention to is playing while having degenerative discs. If they are in the cervical area, sneezing could be a risky activity. Why would I want to whip or flog you if jerking the wrong way could paralyze you? If you're already having excruciating pain that's not being treated in your lower back and numbness due to this, why would I want to risk causing you more harm? Playing is NOT WORTH THE RISK. I don't care when your last session was. Go to a doctor. Go to a physical therapist. Seek medical attention. If you have already, follow their instructions and be careful.

The situation I'm speaking of was where a client decided to give me a deposit for a session. I had been responding to emails every day for weeks regarding this session. We met in public and we are definitely a good match to play! I had a lot of fun during our negotiations. I received the deposit and our session time came up quickly. Unfortunately, a few days before the session the client started having tingling and numbness in his arm that wouldn't go away. He finally went to a doctor and the degenerative discs were discovered. I kept in contact with him, but didn't receive a response as to the location of the discs in question right away. I let it be known that I would not risk his safety by sessioning at this time. I mentioned I would hold onto the deposit for another month considering the time span I've held onto it already...plus the email communication I've been keeping up. Today I received a lovely email telling me how I'm not understanding and am not honest. What is dishonest about holding onto a deposit for nearly three months and keeping in constant email communication? What is dishonest and not understanding regarding caring for a client's health?

As Doms we're constantly having to draw lines with our business. Yes, this is a business. My line is drawn at playing while risking paralyzing someone. The endorphin high is not worth the rest of a life in a wheelchair.